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I was prompting this question to make the screenshot for this post’s web version, and the answer I got from ChatGPT surprised me:
“That’s a huge question—and almost everyone asks it at some point. The tricky part is that there isn’t one single “correct” life path. What you’re really trying to figure out is a combination of purpose, direction, and meaning.”
The first two points are valid. But the third one is not.
Have you ever known someone who started looking for meaning and found it?
Exactly... Because it’s the other way around: you create meaning, and the feeling of purpose finds you. And we’re not talking about a singular moment here but something that happens over time. So, don’t beat yourself up because, in a way, not knowing the definitive answer pulls you towards it, keeps you connected to it. Which is exactly what you need, because motivation is perishable.
This may sound like just another theory but it’s not. I know what it’s like to feel lost, and having the impression that everybody else has figured out their lives while I have no clue what to do next. I felt this way after ending a 6-year relationship mid-pandemic. When life forced me to relocate because I couldn't make ends meet. And when I was making good money at work but feeling completely empty inside.
But I’ve learned that finding direction in this noisy (dis)connected world starts with making choices that are aligned with your values and goals.
When it comes to finding goals, some people think about the productive things that make them lose track of time and enter a state of flow. The activities that make you feel alive. For some it's physical activities like working out or playing sports. For others it's creating things, teaching, or helping people.
Others find direction by studying people they admire. Finding out more about them (books, podcasts, social media etc.) and using their journey as inspiration.
But before doing these things, you need to know your values.
This week's action:
Steve Peters shared an easy way to find values in his book “A Path Through the Jungle”: Write down the qualities you think a good person has.
Not the ones that they “should have” but the ones YOU actually believe. Write the first 5-7 that come up. It can be affirmations or negations.
Take a break and do that right now. Then come back, and continue reading.
Surprisingly, the things you wrote down will very likely reflect your values.
Now look at what you're doing this week. Is it aligned with these values?
If not, adjust.
As long as your actions are aligned with these values, you create meaning. And that's when purpose finds you.
Share this with a friend who might need it.
Thanks for reading,
Valentin